Search This Blog

Followers

Monday, February 29, 2016

LITERARY PLOT: CARROTS

BREAKING NEWS !!!!! US NEWS.

http://www.nasdaq.com/symbol/pg/historical

WORLDWIDE DISCOVERY OF ' WORD ' AND ' SPARK  con·tro·ver·sy ! ' INFLUX OF ' TAMPON ' USE PREDICTS CRASH IN NEAR FUTURE ! STOCK MARKET ' RATTLED ! WHICH GENDER ? WHO KNEW ? EWWWW !

TRUMPLE STATES: " STAY THE COURSE ! USE THEM ! REGARDLESS ! "

HILLERILY SAYS, " OH BIL-LIE !
BUT WHAT OF THE CHILDREN ? "

http://www.nbcphiladelphia.com/news/local/Babies-Found-Dead-in-Philadelphia-Lot-Had-Been-Preserved-Health-Dept-Official-350614941.html

http://www.rollingstone.com/culture/features/fracking-whats-killing-the-babies-of-vernal-utah-20150622

http://www.cnn.com/2015/11/13/europe/germany-babies-bodies-found/

_________________________________________

' VAGINA'S ARE US ' ( and by god, we really mean all of US, your ALL Male Chauvinist Pigs , small clitoris asswipes ! Penis brains ! ) REPORTS:

' VICE PRESIDENT ' Nancy Pelosi on Abortion

http://www.ontheissues.org/CA/Nancy_Pelosi_Abortion.htm


Voted NO on restricting interstate transport of minors to get abortions. To prevent the transportation of minors in circumvention of certain laws relating to abortion, and for other purposes, including:

  • Allowing for exemptions to the law if the life of the minor is in danger or if a court in the minor's home state waive the parental notification required by that state
  • Allocating fines and/or up to one year imprisonment of those convicted of transporting a minor over state lines to have an abortion
  • Penalizing doctors who knowingly perform an abortion procedure without obtaining reasonable proof that the notification provisions of the minor's home state have been satisfied
  • Requiring abortion providers in states that do not have parental consent laws and who would be performing the procedure on a minor that resides in another state, to give at least a 24 hour notice to the parent or legal guardian
  • Specifying that neither the minor nor her guardians may be prosecuted or sued for a violation of this act





_________________________________________________
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Democrate

Top Definition


Democrate
a crate of explosives
did you make sure to wire the democrate?
by Q August 07, 2003
GOOGLED THIS VERY DAY IN NEW MEXICO, OLD MEXICO; SOMEWHAT ' IN ' THE USA.
---------------------------oh-no!----------------------






https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/monkey-cage/wp/2014/06/09/the-truth-behind-irelands-dead-babies-scandal-five-questions/

http://www.koat.com/news/police-investigate-childs-death-in-ne-albuquerque/38259954

http://www.realfarmacy.com/pepsico-says-it-will-halt-use-of-aborted-fetal-cells-in-flavor-research/

The New American – A pro-life leader has won a victory in her efforts to convince soft-drink manufacturer PepsiCo to stop the use of aborted fetal cells in its research for enhancing the flavors of its products. Debi Vinnedge, executive director of Children of God for Life (COGFL), announced that in late April she had received a letter from Paul Boykas, PepsiCo’s vice president for Global Public Policy, confirming that the company will not allow the use of HEK-293 — a cell line derived from human embryonic kidney — in its partnership with Senomyx, the company with which it had inked a four-year, $30 million contract for flavor research.

LITERARY PLOT: CARROTS

NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH LECTURES IN SANTA FE, NEW MEXICO 2006; COGNITIVE UBIQUITY THE EVOLUTION OF INTELIGENCE ON EARTH ( AI ) AND THE QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS BETWEEN THE GUEST SPEAKER AND THE AUDEANCE. BARTON PRINCE ASKS QUESTION IN ' TRIAD WITH OTHERS ' CORNERING DAVID KRAKAUER, UNTIL.........................NOW WITH ME ON THE OTHER END; ALLEYS,THE SAME, YET ' OTHER ' GENDER. ALL THOSE LIVES OF YOUTH.


http://www.santafe.edu/about/people/profile/David%20Krakauer

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pi7h6nmkvAM

" PLATYPUS " DAN FINEMARK, 2006.







When a Beaver Seduces a Platypus



[–]Unidan 48 points49 points  (22 children)

Biologist here!
Platypuses are nuts.
They are one of the few venomous mammals in the whole world! Their spurs have a toxin that can interrupt the flow of ions in the cell. What is means is that your muscles and nerves, which rely on ion gradients to work properly, become interrupted, resulting in spastic or locked movement, making your body nearly uncontrollable where the venom has taken effect!
Like I said, they're mammals, which means they produce milk, but, since they are quite strange mammals, the milk isn't produced in the way that other mammals have gone about it, instead, they have modified sweat glands near hairs and grooves on their stomachs! Lacking any type of nipple, they essentially sweat the milk out and hope their babies can lap it up!
  • permalink
  • save
  • give gold

[–]Shadefox 9 points10 points  (0 children)

That, and they're egg layers.
It's as though Australia's animals weren't quite fucked up enough, so it decided to shit out an abomination.
A cute one though.
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]Sqwalnoc 5 points6 points  (1 child)

don't they also lay eggs?
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]Unidan 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yes!
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (10 children)

Platypussi
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent

[–]Unidan 11 points12 points  (9 children)

Before this debate gets started, let me put the smack down!
In scientific writing, the Latin or Greek plurals are usually not used. That means "octopi" and "octopodes" are both dropped in favor of "octopuses," same goes for "platypi" and "platypodes."
But, if you were just making a pussy joke, I'm okay with that.
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]Platypus81 16 points17 points  (7 children)

As a platypus I can confirm this. Platypuses is correct. Platypodes if you're really trying to impress someone by sounding like you're greek.
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]Unidan 6 points7 points  (6 children)

Thanks for the backup, my monotreme brother.
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]Platypus81 3 points4 points  (5 children)

Can you tell the kids what monotreme means?
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]Unidan 11 points12 points  (4 children)

They gots one hole, and eggs come out of it.
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]Platypus81 6 points7 points  (3 children)

Along with everything else that generally comes out.
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]nothinglikethat 7 points8 points  (1 child)

Except the milk, apparently.
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]Platypus81 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, that oozes out through the skin.
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]Unidan 2 points3 points  (0 children)

So true.
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Pronounced "Plat-a-pa-dees". It is the best form.
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent

[–]pnoyben13 0 points1 point  (0 children)

TIL platypuses = nuts
Source: ^
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]Angry_Canadian_Sorry 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I SWEAR YOU ARE IN EVERY THREAD
But I'm okay with this.
:3
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]Unidan 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's what I do.
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]tmck84 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Aren't they also a lot smaller than beavers? I feel like this picture isn't scientifically accurate.
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]Tomguydude 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Sorry to be such a Grammar Nazi; but isn't it 'Platypi'?
Also, I believe that it's only the males with a poisonous spur on their hind legs.
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]Unidan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nope! If anything, it would be the Greek plural "platypodes."
Scientific writing doesn't use those, though, so it would stay "platypuses."
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]chad0007 48 points49 points  (10 children)

That should be submitted to threadless or something. It's awesome!
  • permalink
  • save
  • give gold

[–]RobSamiam 25 points26 points  (6 children)

It's already in it. I have that shirt ;) http://www.threadless.com/product/3798/Once_You_Pop
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]chad0007 4 points5 points  (3 children)

Thank you! Just ordered it!
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]JaRay 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Annnnnnnd, it's sold out.
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]RobSamiam 3 points4 points  (1 child)

You're welcome ;)
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]MonkeyChik 1 point2 points  (0 children)

;)
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]somecallmejohnny 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Not surprised. Even though the designs are crowdsourced, they all end up with that same style.
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]illdrawyourface 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There are a lot of different styles there. I personally am not very good at coming up with "cute animals/foods with faces" ideas.
The reason why they're so popular is because, well, they sell. other artists want to get printed so they look at what sells really well: pop culture, cute animals, owls, astronauts/space, and inanimate objects with faces. I think it's too much but what can I say? People love buying the tees.
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]Skyeripper 3 points4 points  (1 child)

It reminds me of this one that I have in a hoodie, http://fashionablygeek.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/keytar-platypus-590x382.jpg?cb5e28
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]redegit32 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My favourite venn diagram!
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]Sanoris 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Haha extreme sarcasm. Have an upvote
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]shadowfunk 9 points10 points  (6 children)

If I was that beaver I would fuck the shit outa that platypus
  • permalink
  • save
  • give gold

[–]Platypus81 3 points4 points  (5 children)

I'm sure we can come to some kind of an arrangement.
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]MentalBeaver 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Well hello there...
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]Platypus81 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Is it getting warm in here?
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]MentalBeaver 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think it is.
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]koala7 1 point2 points  (1 child)

age species location ?
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]Platypus81 1 point2 points  (0 children)

3/Ornithorhynchus anatinus/Australia in this nifty pond.
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–][deleted] 21 points22 points  (4 children)

Canaustralia? What a scandal!
  • permalink
  • save

[–]facepalminghomer 3 points4 points  (2 children)

Once you pop...
  • permalink
  • save
  • give gold

[–]CeeBmata 3 points4 points  (1 child)

The beaver don't stop!
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]Forgo_55[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Sounds like a NSFW post
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]Nerdfighter1174 6 points7 points  (3 children)

Beavers seducing platypi happens all the time in Oregon.
  • permalink
  • save
  • give gold

[–]-Rayce 3 points4 points  (2 children)

As an Oregonian I can confirm this.
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]looples 3 points4 points  (0 children)

As a platypi expert I can deny it
            - looks like you arent the only one who didn't show up without 
              proof today
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]DonDraper2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Live in Oregon, went to Oregon State. Would love to seduce a duck, their girls are way hotter.
  • permalink
  • save
  • parent
  • give gold

[–]bubrockit 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Looks like someones getting some Platypussy.
  • permalink
  • save
  • give gold

[–]Forgo_55[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I had no idea people would enjoy this so much. Found this on Google images when I was studying for a Biology exam.
  • permalink
  • save
  • give gold

[–][deleted]  (1 child)

[deleted]

    [–]GARRETTKELLEY 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    http://none/
    • permalink
    • save
    • give gold

    [–]PythonBoomerang 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    Seduces or tricks?
    • permalink
    • save
    • give gold

    [–]the_internet_clown 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    that is adorable
    • permalink
    • save
    • give gold

    [–][deleted]  (1 child)

    [deleted]

      [–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

      Seriously? I have Aspergers and even I picked that up! I'd say closer to Sheldon Cooper than just straight Aspergers!
      • permalink
      • save

      [–]satanica_pandemonium 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Aka: online dating
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]Thats-a-fact 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I only just now realized how much more awesome "Platypus" is than what it's called in my own language...."birdbeakanimal"...we should start calling it platypus...
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]justwannabethatguy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Where's the karma decay?
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]Suspicious_Beaver 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Stop posting my secrets!
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]Mannex 0 points1 point  (2 children)

      holy hell pringles ease up on the viral marketing
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]Platypus81 3 points4 points  (1 child)

      /r/hailcorporate
      • permalink
      • save
      • parent
      • give gold

      [–]Hasaan5 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

      They're hacking accounts to do it now too, /u/Forgo_55 seems to have been hijacked and used to post this.
      • permalink
      • save
      • parent
      • give gold

      [–]umiguess 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      ...can't keep his mind on nothing else, he'll trade the world, for the good thing he's found.
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]skizmcniz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      I'm 26 and I still can't pop open a can of Pringles and not make a duck face with the chips. It's something you just can't stop doing, even when you're older.
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]PocketsandPotato 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      That's a nice lookin' beaver.
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]goteamnick 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      This would never happen in real life. Platypodes are notoriously shy.
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]CookiesRiot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      I want this to belong in /r/aww.
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]lairyspider 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Plait her puss or plait her beaver both is fun.
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]wievo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      This needs to be shown to the Ameristralians or the New Zanadians they'd all LOVE it!
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]neohylanmay 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      One does not simply eat Pringles without making the duck face.
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]minhty 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      I love this.
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]johnvikgreen 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Reminds me of Pepe Le Pew.
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]Zoepezygillman 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Now we get to listen to people use the term "Beaver-Puss" in mature conversation!
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]antsh 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Hope the beaver is the female because if it's a boy, he gonna get poisoned when she realizes the farce.
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]nkear5 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Allow me to educate you on platypuses in song:
      http://none/
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]bluescholar90 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      :) - my reaction.
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]HonorKnightly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      A beaverpuss? Rather redundant, wouldn't you say?
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]nifka 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      ive been seduced by beavers before...
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]Platypusking99 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      I feel very seduced
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]tweak4ever 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      That sounds like the euphemismiest thing in the world
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]sharky1313 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      This may be one of the best pictures I have seen all night. My two favorite animals.
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]AngrySmashi 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Genuinely laughed out loud. This is the cutest thing.
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]Lobsterpunch 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      I wrote a story about something similar back in high school. Maybe you guys will like it!
      Patty, Chuck, And Buck A Children’s Story
      Once upon a time, there was a very wet marsh in the Australian Outback. Here lived Patty the simple minded platypus, she was eight years old and looking for a mate. This idea came about when she was thinking to herself and said, “Hmmm, I think I need a mate.”
      So she went to a bunch of night clubs and various other “hot spots” that attracted other people. But these places only had people and no platypuses, and that was no good for her.
      “Those places are no good for me.” She said to herself on her way back home after another uneventful night. When she was about five minutes away from her den she saw another platypus! He was just minding his own business when she came running up to him huffing and puffing.
      “Hi, who are you?” Patty asked in her hoarse, duck-like voice, “I’m Patty.”
      “Why I’m Chick,” he replied, “I am looking to get myself a mate. You Interested?”
      “Golly, sure!” She said with great enthusiasm.
      This turned out to be a wonderful relationship. They ate together, walked together, and even shared the same piece of dental floss. Heck, they were practically inseperable.
      So one day Chuck got on all fours and proposed. Of course, Patty said yes. It was a beautiful wedding, considering there was only the two of them and the koala minister who was very expensive. There was cake, dancing, and the minister even doubled as a one-man band for just double the price.
      After a couple of months in marriage Patty laid one large platypus egg. She and Chuck were ever so happy, and could not wait for it to hatch.
      Six weeks later out popped a funny looking platypus with a larger and flatter tail, buck teeth, and had no bill whatsoever. It was a boy and he had a funny accent, but his parents still loved him, even though his constant “ehing” got very annoying. His name was Buck.
      He grew up and had rather hard times during his childhood, since he looked and talked so much differently than the other platypus.
      So one day he ran home crying to his mother.
      “All the other kids made fun of me again today!” He told he mother.
      Patty thought how he looked different and how much she loved him.
      “I know you look different, but I love you very much.”
      This is what Patty always told him whenever he had a problem, and it always made him feel instantly better.
      “Thanks mom, I feel instantly better.” He said as he went off to bed.
      As soon as Buck was 18 he left home and said he was going to swim to new land over the eastern ocean.
      “I’m leaving to swim over the ocean to look for new land where I will be accepted,” he told his parents the day he was leaving.
      “Goodbye son, we will miss ya.”
      Buck set off for the ocean right away. He swam and swam and swam and found new land. Here he found others just like him. They said he was a “beaver.”
      “You are a beaver,” they said.
      “I’m home…” He said as the sun went down on his new home.
      The End
      *Edit: Formatting

      [–]gmart711 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

      Nice Repost
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]love_me_again -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

      Fuck you, cockhead
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]Kaerius -1 points0 points  (0 children)

      Made me smile. That's awesome.
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]9601 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

      I nearly threw up that was so cute
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]yourrealparents -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

      Interspecies erotica ? Is this what reddit has been reduced too haha
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]FleXide -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

      Yup. I need to go to bed.
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]ferrbearrr -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

      Beaverpus?
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]Well_Raise_My_Rent -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

      Sounds like a David Sedaris book.
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–][deleted] -2 points-1 points  (1 child)

      this should be on r/ameristralia
      • permalink
      • save

      [–]LinkFixerBot -1 points0 points  (0 children)

      /r/ameristralia
      • permalink
      • save
      • parent
      • give gold

      [–]jangoc44 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

      Once you pop, the fun don't stop. If you know what I mean.
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]dick_in_CORN -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

      All this makes me think of is fucking duck lips
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]t-rav_the_ruler -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

      This looks like a new zanadian trying to seduce an Ameristralian...
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–]Frankeh1 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

      http://none/
      now the beaver is a sexual predator, faking it's way into the platypus's pants.
      • permalink
      • save
      • give gold

      [–][deleted] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

      More like when a beaver mocks a platypus
      • permalink
      • save   

      [–]Clay8288314 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

      he's obviously dosen't like her brains









      ......and welcome ' Pakistan ' reader.

      ________________________________________________________________________________
       

      BELOW: FIRST COMMENT OTHER THAN ALL THOSE ' INTERCEPTED,' BY ?

      THIS IS A COMMENT LEFT FOR ME REGARDING THIS POST IN THIS BLOG. MY STYLE IS ANYTHING BUT SPEEDY OR FAST REGARDING TYPING. I DO NOT KNOW IF IT IS LINKED TO TERRORISM OR ' GAY ' COMMUNITY. HOWEVER, FREEDOM OF SPEACH AND SORRY ABOUT ADD FOR BEARDS; DID LEAVE YOUR NAME.

      fazal amen has left a new comment on your post "UP-DATED 8-17-2015, WITHOUT BEARD ' JAG ' SEPARATI...":

      I am very enjoyed for this blog. Its an informative topic. It help me very much to solve some problems. Its opportunity are so fantastic and working style so speedy.

      ________________________________________________________________________________



      No comments: